Done-ness

 © 2012 “Dancingthots.”  All rights reserved.

 Life occasionally asks that we work longer or harder than we know we “should.”   Many people seem to take such stretching in stride; they even laugh about it together, afterward.  But, I have learned that for me, possibly because of ASD, pushing through can be an unhealthy choice.

A self-imposed, unspoken but instituted “five minute warning” helps me, along with paying attention to what my body-being is ‘saying’ to me.

When it’s nearly “done”, whether emotionally, physically, socially, or any combination of those, my body-being sends out decreasingly subtle signals.  I might feel a slight headache.  I start to droop at my shoulders, subtly collapsing into myself. Irritation begins to express itself. 

 I was taught and had believed that the heroic thing to do was ignore these messages.   

Experience tells me otherwise.

Rest stop: begin to brake . I’m learning that for health and well-being’s sake, I need to honor my body-being realities. Getting overwhelmed?   Soon I will be exhausted.  I should not press through this thing.  I’m finished.

Naps:  It’s possible that a break in the activity will revive me.  Thus, for me, the institution of a daily nap:  lie down, fall asleep, get up, back to work!  Napping helps me clear my weary head. It is the only way I know to stop the thinking processes which I love, but which consume tremendous energy. Having a nap in the schedule allows me to work/rest/work again, rather than work/collapse/take cover.

Personal limits: Learning about personal limits has been a quality-of-life saver.   Historically, I would push and push and push, because everything is so interesting to me, and after all, I reason, nobody else seems to be leaving yet.  The inevitable result of the decision to press through as the others do, against my body’s warnings, has been discouragement, migraines, depression and sometimes illness.  

I’m learning that even if everybody else isn’t done, or even if the situation isn’t done, or some task is not done, if I’m “done”, I am done; I need to step back and take a break.